Musings, Part 1
July 3rd, 2009Good afternoon,
There are several disadvantages that come with unemployment. But their are some great pleasures, too. Time, for instance.
A working newspaper editor has time for little more than the job, a 24/7 pressure cooker with no place to release the steam. It’s a daily battle for institutional and even personal survival. There is little time to think creatively, to read, to watch fun TV or to write, which is what I most missed while on the job.
Unemployment, whatever the cause, brings with it the gift of time. Admittedly, I have squandered too much, at least in terms of my intentions. The daily workouts, for example, lasted only a few weeks. On the other hand, I am cooking a great deal. You can imagine the consequences of that tradeoff.
I am thinking more. That is I am spending time reflecting on my career, on the paths I chose, the jobs I’ve held, the people I’ve known, the triumphs, tragedies, the smart decisions and the mistakes so obvious now I am mortified they were ever made. For better or worse, it has been a long career and so there is a great deal on which to reflect. Productive thinking, as opposed to nostalgic storytelling, ought to produce some sort of identifiable result, some mental outcome that has meaning to me, at least. But some days, I simply enjoy the nostalgic look back, leaving the meaningful outcomes for another time.
So I have been looking back, reflecting and writing. And I think it may be time to post some of those musings on this blog. I don’t pretend for a minute that there is any broader significance to any of this. Nostalgia or reflection? With so much time on my hands, it really doesn’t matter. And if it bores you, that’s OK, too. Hey, it’s my blog. Come back another time when I’m posting about cosmic issues of journalism.
I was asked in a recent job interview not just why I decided to become a journalist, but when. And why, the interviewer asked, did I set out from such an early age to become a community newspaper editor?
I’ve said in speeches or in presentations to college classes that the first influence was the old Saturday afternoon “Superman” TV show. For children of the early ’50s, Saturday morning was devoted to classic cartoons in the morning, followed by shows such as “Rin Tin Tin,” “Fury,” and “Superman.” Those first two instilled in me a love of horses that I’ve indulged for most of my adult life. But it was “Superman” that triggered the interest in journalism. Even a 6-year-old kid knows you can’t grow up to be super human. But Clark Kent was a reporter and that was something you could grow into. He had his own office. He had a nifty gray fedora just like dad’s. And he had a great girlfriend, even if she was legally blind and criminally reckless.
“Superman” made me want to be a reporter and that is no lie.
But it wasn’t until junior high school that the opportunity presented itself, sort of.
There was no school newspaper at Spencer Butte Junior High School when I began my seventh-grade year in 1962. But the world was heating up around us and even junior high students had to take note of life outside school walls. The Cuban Missile crisis. The Kennedy assassination. The presidential election of 1964. We were energized by events and somewhere within the school bureaucracy someone decided it was time to bring back some sort of school newspaper.
I can’t remember how it came about. I know I heard about the paper too late to apply for one of the lead editing positions. Instead, the editor title went to Loren, my bitterest rival, a sworn enemy of the sort that only young adolescents can conjure. He was Goldwater to my LBJ. Calculus to my basic math. My checkmate in the chess club. My unconquerable opponent on the school debate team. He was tall, lean, Linconseque if one can be that at 14.
He was on the school cross country team. I could barely run a lap on the track.
Now he was the editor of “The Spartan Log” and I had to go to him to apply for a staff position.
And he lived up to his sworn-enemy role. He made me “joke editor,” the kid responsible for typing out a few knock-knock or elephant jokes to use as filler on the mimeographed pages. Admittedly, I’ve been told more than once that as a newspaper editor, I am a joke. But this was the real thing, undeniable. It was right there in the title.
And I vowed bloody revenge. Loren, I told my friends, would one day pay dearly for the insult. One day, he would work for me.
My strategy developed later, in the summer of 1965, between junior high and high school. It was a mid-summer day, probably just about this time of year. My best friend, Martin, was hanging out with me in my room. As the neighborhood porn peddler he had stopped by with a few worn and misused magazines now hidden discreetly under the mattress. Clearly, Martin was another junior high geek, not a loser exactly, but another kid who just didn’t seem to fit in Loren-world. We were talking about our plans for high school and how we would make up for the slights and humiliations we had endured.
Martin would be student body president. Would wield limitless power. Shape the school to his vision. And he’d get the girls because we both figured student body presidents always got the girls.
I would be editor of The Axe, I told Martin, editor of a great school newspaper working for the legendary Alyce Sheetz. I would get girls, too, at least I hoped, though high school journalism clearly lacked the sex appeal of a political career. But more importantly, I would get Loren and I would crush his spirit, forcing him to write stories about the annual girls’ charity tea or the Spanish club or the Future Farmers of America sheep-shearing competition. I would be editor and my revenge would be total.
The path was clear. The goal in sight. But then my victim was nowhere to be seen.
When school started in the fall of 1965, Loren was gone. His family had moved, to Illinois as I recall. I heard later that this one-time Goldwater supporter had turned draft resister, had actually gone to jail for refusing induction. I don’t know if that is true or not. But as a future conscientious objector I think maybe Loren and I would have become friends had we grown up together.
With Loren gone, I had to find another reason to be editor of The Axe. And I did. First, it was a girl. But then it was a mission and a purpose and it came to me through Alyce Sheetz, “Sheetzie,” a teacher capable of shaping young lives and the teacher who shaped mine.